


The More The Merrier

by Wolfcry22



Series: The Exhausted Mind of Poe [18]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Depression, Established Poe Dameron/Finn, Gen, M/M, Pilot Poe Dameron, Poe Dameron Has PTSD, Poe Dameron Hurts So Prettily, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Poe Dameron Whump, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Finn (Star Wars), References to Depression, Resistance, bowling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfcry22/pseuds/Wolfcry22
Summary: Finn has to go on a mission. Who does he trust to watch Poe? None other than his support group. Chaos ensues
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn
Series: The Exhausted Mind of Poe [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1605424
Comments: 3
Kudos: 17





	1. Leaving

**Author's Note:**

> This part is bringing back every member of the support group. I tried to differentiate their personalities a bit more in this so that each one seems real in their own way. There will be some mentions of panic attacks and other PTSD episodes, but this one is relatively tame compared to some other ones. I hope you all enjoy!

"Are you sure that you're going to be okay? You know, I can still cancel the mission. It's way more important that I stay here, with you," Finn rambled as he stood with Poe in the center of the room that was used for Poe's trauma support group. It hadn't started yet and people were just beginning to trickle in.

Poe stretched out his hands and clutched Finn's slightly larger hands in his. "This is an important mission. There needs to be a General there. They deserve you, not my fucked up self."

"You're not fucked up," muttered Finn under his breath. "Far from it. However, that doesn't mean that I don't want to leave. I haven't left you since....." Finn trailed off. He knew that he had been separated from Poe during the war. Once his symptoms became regular was when Finn had become nearly connected to Poe at the hip. Finn wasn't ashamed of that. He knew that was what Poe needed. Poe was doing better, but Finn didn't think that he was going well enough to be on his own.

"What seems to be going on here?"

Both Poe and Finn slightly jumped when Dr. Firn walked forward. He had his normal journal that he used to take notes tucked under his arm while his kind eyes seemed even softer when he gazed at the two of them.

"Oh, Dr. Firn, you scared us," Finn told him as he felt his rapidly beating heart finally seeming to settle.

Dr. Firn slightly waved him off. "Is something wrong? I could hear you from my office," he commented with a glance back to a tiny door in the corner that led to Dr. Firn's modest office, if you could even call it that. Finn preferred the term closet.

Poe set his jaw. "Sorry. Finn and I were just discussing that it would be fine if he left me for a few days while he sees to a very important mission," he explained with a pointed look to the former Stormtrooper.

Finn slightly dipped his head in respect before turning back to Dr. Firn. "I understand that, but I don't feel comfortable leaving Poe alone. He has nightmares every night and his flashbacks aren't getting any better. I don't feel comfortable leaving him alone."

Poe looked like he wanted to argue further, but Dr. Firn lifted his hand to cut him off. Poe snapped his mouth shut frustratedly. "I see both sides of this," explained Dr. Firn. "I am in no way an expert on this, but would it work if I checked up on him, or maybe some members of the group?"

Excitement showed on Poe's face as he crossed his arms over his chest and nodded quickly. "Yeah, Finn, I say that's a good compromise."

Finn licked his lips to prolong his answer. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other almost nervously. "I don't know if other members of a support group is the best idea," he began hesitantly.

"I can watch them every step of the way. This may be good for you to spend some time apart," suggested Dr. Firn in his usual calm tone. "Don't you think?"  
  
Finn loved Poe, he really did. However, their personalities could clash sometimes, especially now. Everything Poe did was heightened and any title thing that Finn did could set Poe off. It wasn't that Finn was tired of it, but he certainly needed a break. This mission was beyond important and Finn knew that Poe wasn't going to be ready to take it on. That meant that the responsibility fell to Finn and he was ready for it. He just wasn't ready to leave Poe by himself. Poe had been doing better, but he still had his low moments. He sometimes spoke in a way that concerned Finn if the former stormtrooper was being honest. It was those moments that freaked out Finn the most.

"I suppose," Finn mumbled as he shuffled his feet under him. "But it's—"

"It's nothing. I'm going to be fine," interrupted Poe as he stretched out his hand and rubbed it against Finn's bicep. "I was fine before you showed up and I can manage without you for a few days now."

Finn wanted to point out that he had been fine without him before all of the memories from the war showed up. Finn didn't want to point that out and risk hurting Poe's feelings. Instead, he nodded slowly. "You sure that you can handle it," Finn asked slowly.

Poe gave a vigorous nod. "Of course I can."

"You know, I was thinking that maybe we have a movie night or a game night or something. That would be fun, right," questioned Dr. Firn with a look to Poe and then to Finn.

Poe nodded enthusiastically. Finn was slightly relieved that Dr. Firn was suggesting things to distract Poe while he was gone. It also meant that Poe wouldn't be cooped up in their room and alone with his own thoughts. Finn would certainly feel a lot better if that wasn't the case. "Yeah, that sounds fun to me," agreed Finn.  
  
"See, everything will be fine with me for a few days," Poe continued as he took Finn's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "I will be fine. You do what you need to do and I'll do what I need to do here."

Finn wasn't sure whether or not to believe what Poe was saying. He eventually let out a sigh as he lifted his and Poe's hand to his lips and brushed a light kiss across the knuckles. "You're sure, like really sure? Because if you even have an ounce of unsure inside of you I won't go."

"I will be fine," Poe murmured. His voice was strong and didn't shake in fear. If anything, he seemed confident and unfazed. It almost brought Finn reassurance.....almost.

Finn looked once more to Dr. Firn. He searched the older man's face to see if he could detect any hint of fear or worry about leaving Poe. However, he couldn't find anything except a tiny nod from Dr. Firn. "Alright, then I guess I'm going."

Before Poe could say anything back, there was laughing at the door as Jub and Ri-Tun made their way in. "Hey, Poe," called Ri-Tun as he lifted his hand and gave a tiny wave. "Jub and I were debating the speed capabilities between the X-Wings and TIE fighters. Think you can settle this dispute."

Poe didn't even blink before nodding eagerly. "Of course! If it's one thing I know, it's ships." He leaned over and kissed Finn's cheek before releasing his hand and enthusiastically joining the other two members of the support group.

Finn was left still feeling a tightness in his chest and a reluctant feeling washed over him as Dr. Firn slightly leaned over. "I know that you're worried and you have a right to be. Poe is going to be fine. We will all make sure of it," he murmured softly.

Finn wasn't convinced. "And what happens if you're wrong?"

"Then we will know that he's not ready and you won't have to leave him alone for a while," answered Dr. Firn as he crossed his arms over his chest. "However, you should ask the same question to yourself: what happens if you're wrong?"

Finn slightly bowed his head as he heard Jub, Poe, and Ri-Tun all laughing enthusiastically. No matter what he felt or what he wanted, it didn't matter. He knew that it was time to let Poe go.


	2. Support From The Group

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Poe’s first night away from Finn and he’s a little anxious to say the least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter really delves more into the support group members as individuals. I tried to give each one a part to speak and will continue through this story. I love writing about the support group and exploring each one’s unique circumstances and struggles that brought them to the group. Each one has their own demons and coming together to help one another is an important step in the story as well. I hope you all enjoy this next chapter!

"Alright, alright, everyone calm down. That's enough talking." Dr. Firn waved his hand a few more times before the talking tampered off to whispers that were quickly hushed by Jasp. "Goodness me is everyone talkative today. I'm guessing that means you all are excited for our first bowling night?"

Morry nodded slowly with her arms crossed over her chest and legs sprawled out so that she slumped when she sat. "I didn't even know that this Resistance Base had bowling."

"Yeah, it's new," broke in Poe as he lifted a finger to rub at his nose. "We wanted to make the base feel more like a community and less like a commune, if you know what I mean. We still have our duties and threats come from everywhere, but we want to make this a place that people actually want to live in.”

There were a few whispers, but no one was outright going to say anything. Poe leaned back as he drummed his fingers against his thigh. He knew what everyone was thinking: this base wasn't meant to be a long term home and now that was the unfortunate fate. Poe couldn't go anywhere and neither could many others. Not only was the Resistance most of all that they knew, not every planet was friendly to them despite them winning the war. There were plenty First Order sympathizers that still saw the Resistance as the enemy. Leaving would mean the chance that they would meet some less than friendly people, who may not think twice about killing a Resistance member. 

Dr. Firn turned to his notebook as he cleared his throat. "Alright, let's at least get somethings done so I don't feel bad for ending this session early for bowling. Anyone have any highs or lows this week?"

It was silent as Poe lifted his hand almost beside his head. He was rarely the first to speak, even now when he was completely comfortable. However, he felt this was something important that he needed to share. "I'm not sure if this is a high or a low, but Finn if off world on a diplomatic mission for a few days and I'm here by myself. That hasn't happened for months, not since this all started to happen." His voice gradually grew softer and less confident as he went on and he closed his eyes tightly as if not believing that it was actually happening.

Even though Dr. Firn was well aware of what was happening, he wanted to bring the rest of the group into he conversation. "And how does that make you feel, Poe?"

Poe lifted a hand to rub at the back of his neck. He detested all the eyes looking at him and he struggled not to look down. "Um, okay I guess," he replied with a shrug.

"Man, that would freak me the hell out," Jasp exclaimed with a small nod to Poe. "I mean, I haven't slept in a room alone for years. Even in rehab I had a roommate."

Morry shot Jasp a harsh glare. "Jasp, shut up!"

"What," Jasp asked as he lifted his hands into the air innocently. “It's the truth. I'm not going to lie about it."

Mhina slowly lifted her head as Dr. Firn pointed his pen in her direction, relieved that someone else was asking to speak. "Yes, Mhina. What is your stance on this?"

"Well, I haven't slept in a room with someone in years, so I enjoy it actually. It my be different because you're used to having Finn there, but it doesn't have to be a bad thing," she answered softly.

Dr. Firn let out a heavy breath. "Mhina is right, Poe, and so is Jasp. It can be good and challenging on both sides. You have a right to feel anyway that you do. Don't hesitate to let us know whatever emotion you may have on the matter."

That was an open invitation for Poe to talk more. Before all of the struggles had happened with his memory, Poe had always been very enthusiastic and outgoing. Now, Poe was usually introverted and found speaking difficult. Finn was the one who carried on most of the conversations. Poe was trying to bring back who he was, but he felt he may never be able to communicate as well as he used to.

"I guess I'm feeling okay about it. I'm a little nervous. I haven't been without Finn for a while, like I said, but I think I'll be okay. I have BB-8 and D-O, not to mention you guys." He motioned to the ground around him. "Is that an alright way to feel?"

Dr. Firn nodded slowly. "I told you that anyway you feel is valid. We will be here to support you in whatever you need, Poe. You only need to say the word."

There were murmurs of agreement all around them and Poe dipped his head thankfully. "Thanks, guys, I really appreciate it."

"Any other highs and lows of the week?" Dr. Firn gave a brief pause. "Come on. I couldn't get you guys to quiet down at the start of this meeting. Clearly there is more going on than just this."

There was a slight pause before Jasp spoke up. "Well, my wife and I want to renew our wedding vows. I guess that's pretty good news."

"Pretty good news," echoed Morry in shock as she snorted in amusement. "It's fantastic news! Good for you, Jasp!"

Jub leaned over and kicked his foot against Jasp's ankle. "Way to go, man."

"Yeah, I have one lucky lady to stand by me all this time," Jasp sighed as his shoulders hunched. "I just wish I could make it up to her."

"You are doing well by getting help. None of you should feel like burdens to the ones around you. You all deserve just as much love as anyone else," Dr. Firn told the group while his gaze rested on Jasp. "You exchanged vows when you got married, yes?"

Jasp nodded timidly. "Yes, we did."

"And I take it you recited 'for better or for worse'," Dr. Firn continued.

Jasp gave another tiny nod. "Yes."

"Well, this counts as better or worse. All of you could be married one day and you will make that vow. Do not take it lightly," Dr. Firn continued as he swatted his pointer finger at each and everyone one of them in turn. "Choosing a mate is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. If they make you feel bad for your moods or complex emotions, they aren't the one for you."

Poe lifted his hand through his shirt and felt the cool metal ring that was connected to a chain around his neck. It was his mother's wedding ring, which had been given to Poe to give to the women that he would one day marry. Poe realized that his mother never even though of the possibility that he would fall for a man. He only slightly worried what she might say. He knew that she had loved him, but she had died when he was so young. Poe longed to be able to speak to her just one more time and tell her all about the man that Poe had fallen in love with. Unfortunately, that didn't seem possible.

"Poe, you still with us," asked Dr. Firn as he snapped his fingers.

Poe gave a fierce shake of his head as he snaked his hand from his chest where he had been clutching the ring. "Yeah, sorry, I um was distracted."

Dr. Firn nodded patiently. "Very well." He scribbled a few more things into his notebook. "Anyone else have anything they want to talk about?" Everyone remained silent as Dr. Firn closed his notebook. "Alright then. Who's ready for bowling?"

Jub let out a hoot of excitement while Mhina and Ri-Tun nodded enthusiastically. Even Morry, who rarely got excited about much, was smiling wickedly. Dr. Firn chuckled as he rose to his feet. "I hope you all are ready to loose to a bowling champion,” he boasted, cracking his knuckles excitedly.

"Yeah, right," snorted Ri-Tun. "I think that Poe is going to the the best as it. If he can fly an X-Wing, he can roll a ball."

Poe shook his head quickly. "I'm not so sure about that." He never really did any bowling. He knew that it wasn't complicated and he hoped that he did well.

He would do anything at the moment to take his mind off of Finn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part focused some on Jasp and Jub since I feel like I haven’t given them enough attention. Naylo, Ri-Tun, Mhina, and Morry will have a larger role in the chapters to come, so I promise I did not forget about them.
> 
> This chapter briefly touched on the idea of disassociation, which is when someone with PTSD, anxiety, or another mental illness will retreat into their own mind or will feel disconnected from reality. It can often take an outside influence to bring them out and that’s why Dr. Firn snapped his fingers and called Poe’s name. This is something I’m going to go back to later in this series but I wanted to clear up what it could be in case anyone was confused.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this part and are staying safe and healthy!


	3. Bowling and Blowups

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wouldn’t be Poe’s life if something didn’t go not according to plan even when having fun. Luckily Poe has good friends to help him through it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part is going to have some more character development for the other members of the support group. I hope their personalities started to shine through in the writing. I hope you all enjoy!

A bowling ball rolled down the lane and crashed into the ten pins, sending them splintering into the air as they were knocked down. It left a gaping hole where the pins used to be as Jub turned around with excitement glimmering in his slightly beady eyes.  
  
"Great job, Jub," exclaimed Ri-Tun as he came from behind Jub and shook his shoulders enthusiastically. "You're killing it!"

Jub slightly shrugged him off as he came over to have a seat at the table that was right behind the bowling lanes. Poe looked up and smiled as Jub sat across from him. "Beat that, Dameron," he jabbed good naturally.

Poe felt a stirring inside his stomach, but he couldn't let Jub know. "I'lll show you," he told them with a smile on his face as he rose to his feet stiffly.

He walked over to a spherical machine that spit the bowls from the lane to the machine. Poe slipped his fingers into the holes of the ball and started forward, breathing heavily with the bowling ball pressed against his chest. He strode forward and threw the ball down the lane with a hearty burst of speed. It veered to the left, but it still managed to crack into half of the pins and send them leaping into the air.

The sound was harsh and caused Poe to lift his right hand almost in his fear and pull at one of his curls over his ear until the slightly stinging pain was too much. He walked back swiftly so that his feet almost didn't touch the ground as he glided forward.

Morry, who had been leaning back in her chair with her feet propped up on the chair Poe had previously occupied, sat up so that her feet rested on the ground. "Hey, you still have another turn," she called after him.

Poe didn't even turn when he heard his name. He kept walking until it turned into a frantic run. He could feel his breath seeming to rise inside of him as panic started to overwhelm him. Each step seemed to take him farther to his destination instead of closer. However, he wasn't quite sure where he was trying to go. He was walking out of pure instinct and he was almost too terrified to find an appropriate place to go. 

The closest place that he could see was a mens’ fresher. His frantic feet immediately brought him over to the fresher and he swung the door open. He panted as he stumbled forward and lowered down in one of the corners, across from the sinks. It wasn't an overly large fresher, but it was just the right size for Poe to press into. No one was in there, luckily, as his mind began to run free.

He closed his eyes tightly and heard explosion after explosion in his ear as he flew his X-Wing through enemy fire. He stretched out his hands and thrust them hard against the floor. He worked his nails against the cold ground until he felt it becoming slick with his own blood. He gasped when he heard a scream of one of his squadron members in his ear. He could feel heat pulsing over him and overwhelming him when there was nothing that he could do about it. Poe felt hot tears starting to stream from his eyes as his body felt rigid.

"Stop it. Stop it. Stop it!" Poe thrust his head backwards so that the back of it collided harshly with the wall. Pain exploded through his skull and little black dots appeared at the corner of his vision. The pain wasn't enough of a distraction as Poe clamped his hands harder over his ears as he let out a low cry.  
  
The door to the fresher suddenly opened as Morry and Mhina poked their heads in. "We can't go in there," whispered Mhina worryingly. "It's the mens' fresher."

"Like hell we can't," Morry snapped back as she led the way with Mhina reluctantly following. She was about to crouch beside Poe when Mhina stretched out her hand and pulled Morry back. Morry reluctantly hovered a few feet from Poe with her arms crossed over her chest. "Hey, Dameron, you alright?"

Poe let out a breathy whimper. He didn't look up and didn't speak. All he could see was him flying his X-Wing as explosions happened around him and cries echoing in his ears. He felt blood trickling from his head and down the back of his neck. His breath was coming in labored gasps while his heart seemed to plummet into his stomach. His thoughts were running wild and uncontrolled.

"What are we going to do," Morry questioned as she looked over to Mhina. "I don't have any experience with this stuff. I'm here for anger management, not panic attacks."

Mhina's intelligent eyes seemed to flash in the artificial light that glared overhead. She nodded cautiously. "I do," she breathed fearfully as she slightly tugged on the ends of her dress. She sucked in a heavy breath as she kneeled down to the side of Poe, just enough to have a comforting presence and not be overbearing. If he looked up he would be able to see her, but she wasn't sitting too close to him. "Poe, Poe, it's Mhina. Can you hear me?"

Poe shifted with his head slightly shaking from side to side. Although he didn't verbally answer, Mhina could tell that he was in there somewhere. She let out a slow breath to calm herself before continuing. "Poe, can I touch you? Just your shoulder?"  
  
"Ngnnn, yes," Poe replied after making a sound that sound strained and painful in his throat.

Mhina couldn't help but smile. "Alright." She rested her hand gingerly on his shoulder. She then flicked her wrist to Morry, who came on Poe's other side just as Mhina was speaking. "Can you look at me? Or move your hands from your ears? That way I know that you're paying attention."

It took a great effort before Poe repeated the death grip he had seemed to have on his ears. They were red from the pressure that he placed on them. His head finally lifted up and he met Mhina with watery eyes. "They're gone."

"Who's gone," chided Mhina gently.

"My squadron, the Resistance. They're gone because of me and what I did," Poe croaked after another moment of painful silence.

Morry shook her head madly. "They aren't gone. Mhina and I are apart of the Resistance and we're still here. You haven't lost us," she chided.

"Not everyone, but some. I-I made a decision and it got them killed. I can hear their voices." He threatened to lift his hand back up. "I can hear them in my head."

Mhina stretched out both of her own hands to gingerly grasp his wrist. She struggled not to flinch even though she had been the one to initiate the contact. A lump rose in her throat as she tried to calm herself before she became as terrified as Poe was of her. "I know that you can, but I need you to focus on my voice. Morry and I are right here and we're not going anywhere."

There was suddenly loud booming laughter from outside the fresher. Alarm sparked through Poe and Mhina immediately looked to Morry. "Guard the door. Make sure no one comes in.”

"Now that's something I can do," Morry announced as she proudly jumped to her feet and made her way out of the fresher.

Poe blinked his eyes in surprise as he looked around as if realizing his surroundings for the first time. "This is the mens' fresher," he mumbled.

Mhina nodded slowly. "Yes, it is," she replied gently. "I have to say that I've never been in here before. The ladies is much nicer."

"I'm sure," answered Poe as he let out a small laugh, which in turn caused Mhina to laugh. He then looked down to his wrists and saw that she was still grabbing on.

Mhina drew backwards in surprise. "Sorry, I'm....I'm sorry," she stammered with a tiny shake of her head. "I didn't mean—“

"No, I'm sorry," interrupted Poe with an ashamed shake of his head. "I shouldn't have. I didn't mean to, you know, um....."

"Poe, you don't need to apologize for it. I'm the one who initiated the touch, not you," Mhina replied as she lowered her hands and rubbed at her knees. She then flicked her head toward the space beside Poe. "Mind if I sit beside you?"

"Not at all," replied Poe as he slightly shifted over. Mhina gave a moment's hesitation before sliding down beside Poe and sighing heavily. "Finn is never going to leave me alone again if I can't even handle fucking bowling." He immediately flinched when he looked over to Mhina. "Sorry! I forgot that I'm talking to you and not guys in my squadron. I'll try to do better with that."

Mhina waved him off. "It's alright. Also, you don't know about Finn."

"I know Finn. He didn't want to go anyway and now that this happened he will be even more reluctant to leave," Poe muttered as he lifted a hand and rubbed it against his eye to dry it.

Mhina tilted her head, her soft voice carrying. "I'm not so sure. If he knows that you did have an issue and was able to work through it with those that care about you, I don't think he will mind. If anything, he'll be proud."

Poe grimaced. "I don't know about that. You don't know Finn."

"Not well, no, but I do know that he loves you. He's kind and has a good heart. I also know that he cares more about you than any damn person who abandoned you when you needed them most," Mhina replied, her voice surprisingly firm. That certainly wasn't normal for her.

Poe couldn't help but laugh at hearing Mhina. "Look at you, using all the language. Remind me never to piss you off."

"All joking aside, I don't think that you have anything to worry about with Finn. Tell him the truth. He'll understand that these things happen, but you have us to lean on," Mhina continued with a small nod to Poe.

"Hey, keep walking! Nothing to see here!"

Upon hearing Morry's voice, Poe and Mhina snickered. "We should probably get out of here before Morry attacks some poor guy who needs to take a leak," joked Poe warmly.

Mhina nodded in agreement as she pushed herself to her feet. She then cautiously stretched out a hand toward Poe. "Come on. Let's finish this night right."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a nice change of pace to really focus on Mhina and Morry. I know that I’ve done a lot with Mhina in the past, but I feel like I haven’t with Morry and I wanted to show more sides to her than just the tough one with an attitude. I hope you guys enjoyed and are staying safe and healthy!


	4. Coming Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn returns to the base to find out what happened with Poe and the rest of the support group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be the last part in this story of the series. I have thoroughly enjoyed writing this one, especially bringing back the support group members and giving them a little more character development and something to do other than just sit around. Anyway, I hope that you guys enjoy this next chapter!

Finn stepped off from the ship that he had been on as exhaustion washed over him. He carried a small bag over his shoulder with a change of clothes and he wanted nothing more than to climb into bed and fall asleep for months. However, he had received a message from Dr. Firn that he wanted him to attend one of the support group meetings that night.

Finn made his way down the hallway with his eyes slightly closing tiredly. He forced himself to snap back into reality and where he was walking when he accidentally walked into the wall. He shook his head to clear it as he found Dr. Firn's room where the group was being conducted. Finn tapped his fist against the door as he took a step back, his feet shuffling.

The door opened to reveal a large Kel-Dor standing in front of him. No matter how tired Finn was, he was always pleased to see the members of the group that had helped Poe so much. "Hey, Ri-Tun. It's so good to see you," Finn gushed.

Ri-Tun took a step to the side as he motioned for Finn to come in. "It's good to see you too! How was your mission," he questioned.

"It was good," answered Finn almost dismissively as he set down his bag beside the wall before heading forward to see the group already sitting in a circle, chattering away while Dr. Firn finished up some observations in his notebook.

As Finn drew closer, Poe looked up from where he had been joking with Jasp, his eyes slightly drawn closed as he laughed. He realized that Finn was standing there and Poe immediately rose to his feet and surged past Morry and Naylo. 

The two quickly embraced with Poe burying his head into Finn's neck, savoring the feeling of the strong ex-Stormtrooper against him. Finn hugged him tightly in relief to feel Poe’s heartbeat beating strongly against him. The two slightly pulled back once they shared a passionate kiss. The rest of the members in the group laughed and clapped in excitement.  
  
"Get a room!"

Poe smiled through their kiss as he reluctantly pulled away, panting for breath. He settled for gripping Finn's hand surely and giving it a reassuring squeeze. Finn and Poe walked hand in hand over to the seats and the two settled beside each other.

Dr. Firn clapped his hands a bit to draw everyone’s attention. "Alright, alright, let's do this as quickly as possible. It's late and I know that you all have work in the morning."

Finn couldn't help but yawn at the thought of work the next morning. It was the last thing that he wanted to do, however, he knew that he had to pay attention to whatever was going to be said. He wouldn't be there if it wasn't at least somewhat important.

"What happened while I was gone," Finn dared to ask.

Poe instantly looked down in embarrassment, shoulder hunched while Naylo leaned over to whisper in Jub's ear. Jasp looked to the ceiling while Morry tapped her foot impatiently. It was Mhina who finally spoke. She explained everything that happened from Poe's panic attack thanks to the sound of the bowling and how he had hid in the fresher. She talked about how Mhina and Morry went to find Poe and had talked him down from it. The rest of the group had been more than willing to leave bowling early and they decided to have a movie night. Something light with a lot of cheap comedy had been just what they all needed and wanted. 

After hearing Mhina tell what had happened, Finn felt almost sick. His eyes closed as he took in a heavy breath. "I was worried something like that would happen. I knew that I shouldn't have gone!"

Poe stiffened as he looked even more down if that was possible. His eyes squeezed shut even though his hand was still clutched tightly with Finn's.

"Wait a moment, Finn," broke in Dr. Firn as he lifted his hand patiently to halt Finn before he could become too caught up in his own thoughts. "I think that there are some of us in here that may have something to say before you decide something so rash."

Finn looked like he had already made up his mind when Naylo shifted first before looking to Finn. "Yes, we had a little problem. We knew that it could happen, but this was different this time. When he came back from the fresher, he was timid and a little sullen, sure, but we expected that. He was able to snap out of it and enjoy the rest of the night. That's pretty admirable if you ask me."

Finn was slightly surprised. He had never really had a conversation with Naylo before. He spoke to Mhina the most out of the group, which was saying something since Mhina was so timid, especially of anyone who was male. The fact that Naylo would speak to Finn about what happened spoke volumes for his conviction in the matter.

Mhina shifted almost uncomfortably as she leaned forward. "Morry and I went into the fresher. Poe was a little combative, rightfully so. It took him a little while to deal with it, but he did with Morry and I's help."

"It was all Mhina really," broke in Morry with a smirk on her face as she nodded to Mhina. "I was just guarding the door. She was in there."

Mhina rolled her eyes. "Poe helped himself more than any of us could’ve.”

"What we're getting at," broke in Jasp. "Is that Poe did have a panic attack. He had fierce symptoms because of the sound of bowling. Not ideal, right? What is good is that he was able to help himself and talk himself out of it. Now that is what we should be taking away from this."

Finn was still skeptical. He looked to Dr. Firn. "And do you think that this is a good thing that he had a PTSD episode?

"A good thing? No. However, I do know that there is progress and that's what you need to see. Whether or not you feel comfortable leaving is up to you. You have a right to feel what you feel. Just don't let your fear stop Poe's progress."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Finn heard Dr. Firn's words echoing in his ears as he brushed his teeth. He could hear Poe in their bedroom, whispering to BB-8 and D-O the way that he usually did before any of them went to charge for the night. Finn looked at himself in the mirror and saw how tired he looked. He grunted as he leaned forward and spat into the sink before rinsing out his mouth with water he had cupped with his hands from the sink.

He then splashed some water on his face before coming back into the bedroom after closing off the light in the fresher. He hung back to watch as Poe bowed his head and kissed the top of BB-8's dome. If anyone would ever ask, Poe would deny showing his droid so much love. However, it was a ritual they did every night and Finn knew how much each enjoyed it.

D-O rolled up next with a giddy excitement about him. He had grown a lot more comfortable with Poe, especially when it came to trusting him. He also wanted anything that BB-8 had, not that Poe would ever call him on it. Poe lowered down and kissed the top of D-O's head. The green and white droid enthusiastically rushed around in a tight circle before following BB-8 to their respective charging stations.

Finn came over to Poe quietly, slipping around him affectionately. Poe looked up slowly before turning so that he could pull his legs onto he bed. Finn climbed behind him and flopped down heavily. Poe reached over to turn off the light as he rolled onto his side, facing away from Finn.

Poe nearly jumped when he felt skin lightly graze his. It took a moment until he felt Finn lean against him and trail light kisses up his neck and then to his cheek. He wrapped his arms around Poe's waist as he held him close. "I missed you," Finn mumbled into the back of Poe's neck.

A rumble of pleasure rolled in Poe's throat in agreement. "I missed you too. I wanted to be with you so much."

"You won't have to worry about that anymore. I don't think I'm going to be leaving for a while," Finn breathed softly, stirring Poe's hair.

Poe whimpered as he suddenly rolled over to face Finn. The former Stormtrooper blinked his eyes in surprise as Poe met Finn's gaze. "I didn't want to worry you. I know that I'm getting better. I got myself out of it for the most part."

Finn tipped his head upward and kissed the tip of Poe's nose. "I know. This isn't about you. It's more about me. I'm proud of you and I'm not upset. It would just make me feel better to be with you for a little while. Is that such a bad thing?"

"I guess not," replied Poe distractedly.

"This is a good thing. A very good thing," Finn replied as Poe rolled back to his side so that Finn could pull him close. Poe felt comforted to have Finn beside him but he couldn't help but feel a trickle of dread that Finn didn't trust him to be on his own. He knew that he would just need to continue to prove to Finn that he was working on making himself better so that one day Finn would no longer to afraid to leave him. Until then, Poe was going to soak up every moment that he spent with Finn that he possibly could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter doesn’t have a definite happy or not happy ending. I wanted to show that even though Poe was able to break himself out of his flashback with the help of Morry and Mhina, Finn is still hesitant to leave him. It’s a common struggle those that have friends or family with PTSD to be fearful to leave them alone, even as they make strides in the right direction. There is turmoil on both sides and it can be frustrating for both parties involved. It doesn’t make one person right or wrong, but it does complicate things to say the least. Anyhow, I hope that you all enjoyed this and are staying safe and healthy!

**Author's Note:**

> And Finn is leaving for a little while. I know that Poe can handle himself on his own, but it’s sometimes difficult for those with PTSD to ground themselves without support, especially when they can’t identify certain triggers. I hope you guys like it so far and are staying safe and healthy!


End file.
